Create in Us a New Heart

       James Martin, SJ is a favorite author of mine.  I receive an email meditation from him several times a week.  During this week, he again has expressed his thoughts and feelings so well in his prayer about the terrible gun violence our nation experienced within the last four days.

But he wrote this prayer in October 2017, after the horrible mass shooting in Las Vegas...

Almighty God, I come before you,
once again,
after another shooting.

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I am sad, God.

So I ask you
to receive into your loving care the souls of those who were killed,
to care for those who were wounded or hurt in any way,
to console the family members and friends of those who died or were wounded,
to strengthen the hands of the rescue workers, medical professionals and caregivers

I pray too for the shooter, as I must as a Christian.

All this makes me inexpressibly sad, God.
But I know that the sadness I feel is your sadness.
It is the same sadness your son expressed
when he wept over the death of
his friend Lazarus.

I am tired, God.
I’m tired of the unwillingness to see this as an important issue.
I’m tired of those in power who work to prevent any real change.
I’m tired of those who say that gun violence can’t be reduced.

All this makes me tired.
But I know that the tiredness I feel is your tiredness.
It’s the same tiredness that Jesus felt after his own struggles against injustice
that led him to fall asleep on the boat with his disciples.

I am angry, God.
I’m angry at the seeming powerlessness of our community to prevent this.
I’m angry at the selfish financial interests who block change.
I’m angry that these shootings happen at all.

But I know that this anger is your anger
It’s the same anger Jesus felt when he overturned the tables in the Temple,
angry that anyone would be taken advantage of in any way.

Help me see in these emotions your own desire for change.
Help me see in these feelings your moving me to act.
Help me see in these reactions your pushing me to do something.

Because I know this is the way you move people to action.

And I know that you desire action.
For Jesus did not stand by while people were being hurt.
He plunged into their lives.

So help me to answer these questions:
How can I help?
How can I fight against gun violence?
How can I urge my political leaders to enact change?
How can I help people understand that this is
an issue about life?

I am sad over the loss of life,
tired of excuses for the loss of life,
and angry that we are paralyzed by the loss of life.

So

Turn my sadness into compassion.
Turn my tiredness into advocacy.
Turn my paralysis into the freedom to act.

Help me
to be compassionate,
to advocate
and to act,
as your son did,
Almighty God.

      In true Jesuit fashion - and as we are all called to do - Martin asks the Mighty One to help us find God in these events too.  He asks God for strength and to help us imitate the empathy of Jesus.  Martin asks us to do more than pray but to let our prayer become action.  HERE is how we find "God in all things."  The very goodness of our Creator is found in each one of us; it is our birthright!  And we can choose to see God in the words and acts of mercy, love, compassion, understanding, and forgiveness that follow these horrendous acts that are NOT of God's doing or desire.

    I invite us to not so easily move on and then forget the souls that were taken from their families and friends.  I invite us to pray for the survivors who will experience repeated trauma, fear, and survivor's guilt.  I invite us to pray for the ones who are so lost and afraid that they feel compelled to take such unconscionable actions.

    And lastly, let's pray for one another that we don't lose hope.  Then despair wins.  Pray that we don't lose trust in one another.  Then fear wins.  Pray that we don't become numb.  Then hatred wins.  Let's pray for a change of heart in our leaders and in the people living within our nation.   💙

Midweek Meditation – What does your Heart Feel?

      This anonymous prayer was left by the body of a child that had died at Ravensbruck death camp and, to me, it perfectly exemplifies how we are made in God’s image.  For the mercy that God shows to us, we are then capable of showing to others.  It is only through God that we can do so, by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit.  We are all children of the same loving and forgiving Creator; therefore, we are all capable of this same grace and mercy that is expressed in this prayer.

O Lord,

Remember not only the men and women

of good will, 

but also those of ill will.

But do not remember all the suffering they inflicted on us;

remember the fruits we have bought,

thanks to this suffering –

our comradeship, our loyalty,

our humility, our courage,

our generosity,

the greatness of heart which has grown out of all this;

and when they come to judgment

let all the fruits which we have borne

be their forgiveness.

Amen.

How do you feel while reading this prayer?  (When I read it for the first time, years ago, I had to read it twice to be sure I had read it correctly.)  How are you able, or not, to comprehend this ability to forgive?  Would you be able to let your heart be melted enough to say this kind of prayer - or would your heart become hardened to the people who caused this child's death?  

Knowing that "God is Love,"

may we grow in our understanding 

of God's boundless mercy.

💙

The Hearts of those Who Know Us

He came to his hometown and began to teach the people in their synagogue,

so that they were astounded and said,

 “Where did this man get this wisdom and these deeds of power? 

Is not this the carpenter’s son? Is not his mother called Mary?

. . . Where then did this man get all this?” And they took offense at him.

But Jesus said to them, “Prophets are not without honor except in their own country

 and in their own house.”  - From Matthew 13

          I have found over recent years that not everyone is happy for you when you change your life for the better.  Not everyone wants to hear that you’re a new believer or a more devout believer in God.  Not everyone wants to know that you’ve changed at all, in any way. 

The reactions from family and friends can come from fear that they’ll lose you, that they’ll lose the person they knew, that you won’t be the same (perhaps raucous) party lover that you’ve always been.  They may even be jealous that you’ve grown – and they have not.  Some may feel envious of your spiritual life, but they won’t use this feeling to change their own spiritual lives but to downplay and even insult yours.

The latter is how I see the hometown people of Jesus too, from the reading above.  Their remarks are hurtful and belittling.  Their disbelief in the capabilities of their neighbor, Jesus, goes to show that we never know what is going on within another person’s heart and life.  We never know the various gifts that others humbly possess, like Jesus had and offered to many.

So how do we get around these people who unwittingly try to tempt us away from growing in the knowledge and love of God?  The first thing I suggest is to pray for them.  Pray for a change of heart within them.  Our prayers may not visibly change them, but these kinds of prayers will certainly change us and give us strength when we’re around them.  And sometimes we just have to let go of some people.  With a deeper faith, we may find that some people, even family members, can be toxic for our souls as well as our minds.  But we don’t want to close the door on them, because I think when people are truly bothered by something important that we’re doing, it can possibly mean that they see a need in themselves.  Spiritually speaking they may feel they’re being nudged by God too and really don’t know what to do with those feelings.  We may be the impetus they need to step out in faith.  The Holy Spirit may be using us to reach them.

When I have faced this same type of situation more than once, unfortunately, I was hurt.  But I chose to remember that I am in good company.  I am in the BEST of company.  And that’s the heart of the matter.  💙

For Hurting Hearts – Ours and God’s

But to you who are listening I say: 

Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 
bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.
If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also.
If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 

Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you,

do not demand it back. 

Do to others as you would have them do to you. 

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? 

Even sinners love those who love them. 

 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? 

Even sinners do that. 

And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, 

what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, 

expecting to be repaid in full. 

But love your enemies, do good to them, 

and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. 

Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, 

because He is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. - Luke 6:27-36 (NIV)

 ☩

        As we are made in the image and likeness of God, can we do any less? Yes, we can and we do - so much less - as the past 24-hours’ news reaches us on this beautiful summer Sunday morning.

But we are called to be more than our mere mortal selves. We are called to “Be merciful, just as” our heavenly Parent is merciful to us in all our flaws.  We are called to be as perfect as the One who created and loves us – ALL of us.

For those whose lives were lost, and for those whose lives are forever changed, may you find the Love of the Creator, the Peace of the Redeemer, and the Consolation of the Holy Spirit.  Amen. 

💙

Praying for a Lighter Heart

      As I received two different medical test results over the past 36 hours, I find myself reeling and evaluating life again - and my life specifically.  I know that I am called to hold all things lightly and to see God in all things.  

And I can, and I do.

I want very much to live a long life with all those I love along with enjoying the tremendous beauty of people and this glorious earth.  And I want an opportunity to do the work that I've studied so hard to do for God.  But I know that when I told my Lord that I would do whatever God wanted me to do with my life, I was opening myself up for not only adventure and joy, but also probably more than a bit of confusion at times...

This prayerful heart of mine would like to not question what life brings.  I would like to just accept immediately - without hesitation and without fear of any kind.  I would like to be brave and to offer anything I suffer - mentally, emotionally, and physically - in reparation toward all the wrong that human beings have committed because of our greed, prejudice, anger, bigotry, selfishness, and, let's face it, just plain old-fashioned sin.  But I know there's something I am to learn by getting questionable results from medical tests.  Mainly, I think what I'm supposed to learn is patience (as these tests now require more tests and longer waiting) and also learn how scary things are not meant to make us bitter but more understanding and kinder toward others.  I know God wants the best for me, but I get confused by the "best" when there's always the "lessons."  I'm sure many of you know what I mean.  

So I pray for a lighter heart at this moment:  I want a heart that continues to grow in love with God.  I want to trust more and question less.  I have a post-it note above my kitchen sink (well, I have at least a half dozen) that reads, "Let me find you by loving You.  Let me love you in finding You."  Somehow these two lines are a comfort to me tonight.  I can't remember where I read them, but they were so meaningful that I copied them down weeks ago to keep in mind.  So I just Googled it, found it, and now happily share with you this stunning prayer by St. Anselm of Canterbury:

O my God, teach my heart where and how to seek You,

where and how to find You.

You are my God and You are my all and I have never seen You.

You have made me and remade me,

You have bestowed on me all the good things I possess,

Still I do not know You.

I have not yet done that for which I was made.

Teach me to seek You.

I cannot seek You unless You teach me

or find You unless You show Yourself to me.

Let me seek You in my desire,

let me desire You in my seeking.

Let me find You by loving You,

let me love You when I find You.

Amen

💙

Midweek Meditation - The Heart of Ignatius of Loyola

       Today, July 31^st, is the Feast Day of St. Ignatius of Loyola.  It is his spirituality in which I was trained, as a spiritual director, and whose spirituality that I follow in much of my day-to-day living. 

Below I share with you one of his most famous prayers.  It sums up his deep devotion to God and to his love for things eternal.

Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty,
my memory, my understanding,
and my entire will,
All I have and call my own.

You have given all to me.
To you, Lord, I return it.

Everything is yours; do with it what you will.
Give me only your love and your grace,
that is enough for me.

Frankly, the first time I read this prayer, I thought here is yet again proof that I am not a saint – and I’ll never be one.  But whenever I recite these words, I really do try to mean them.  Sometimes I will take one line at a time and ask myself whether I am “there” yet.  Everyday I can say the words, “You have given all to me,” and deeply believe them.  But “Everything is yours; do with it what you will” – that’s really a hard one to mean.  (It goes along with the Ignatian spirituality of holding all things lightly.)

And yet at other times, I do mean it when I ask the Lord to take and receive “my memory,” because I don’t like remembering those times when I offended or let down God (and myself) so badly.  Remembering those times are not useful to my soul. I'm forgiven, so now I move on with God's grace.  Also when I tell the Lord to give me only “your love and your grace,” I can mean it, because I want to want only the things of heaven and not the things of this world.

So during today's time of meditation, I invite you to take each line of this prayer (known as The Suscipe – the Latin word for Receive) and see what it means for you and for your spiritual life.  Are you able to read just one line of it – and mean it?  If not, can you read one line in it and want to mean it?  If so, that’s the place to start!  May God’s love and grace go with you today.   💙

P.S.   Click here if you want to learn about the life and conversion of Ignatius of Loyola.

Happy Feast Day, St. Iggy!

The Heart of our Prayers

“He said to them,

When you pray, say

‘Father, hallowed be your name.

Your kingdom come.

Give us each day our daily bread.

And forgive us our sins,

for we ourselves

forgive everyone indebted to us.

And do not bring us to the time of trial.’”

-         Luke 11: 1-4  (NRSV)

         In the first half of today’s Gospel, Jesus gives a blueprint for how His followers could pray.  One of the disciples asked for his help with prayer, and Christ’s response has become eternal. 

You may have noticed, as I did, that these words are direct and to the point.  First, we are to praise God and God’s Name in all of time, and then we are to ask for our needs to be met – all that’s truly necessary – enough food for this day, forgiveness for ourselves along with mercy enough for us to give to others, and then hope for a happy death and eternal life with God. 

The heart of this prayer, to me, is two things:  First Jesus teaches us a new way to speak to the Creator – nothing flowery and elaborate here.  We’re allowed to get straight to the point. Second, because Jesus came to teach us who God is  – “He who has seen me has seen the Father” (John 14:9) – and how much like a loving Father God is to us.  This view of God was new and intimate!

Some of us have trouble saying this prayer, and addressing God as ‘our Father’ because we may have had the type of Father that Jesus refers to later in this same reading: “Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for a fish, will give a snake instead of a fish?” Nowadays we seem to hear and read about these types of fathers in the news way too often. Perhaps this was the kind of father that we had.  In addition to it being very sad and painful we can carry this idea of “father” into all parts of our lives, including our spiritual lives.  

Jesus tells us that by watching him, we have seen the Creator, the Father.  He said that He and the Father are one, and throughout His earthly life, Jesus treated everyone with loving compassion, mercy, and healing kindness.  Therefore, our Father in heaven is the same.  Even if our earthly fathers missed the mark in holiness, our Heavenly Father is perfect and gives us everything we need for life in this world and the next.

And if you need to think of our Creator as without gender, then call God by another beloved name, another pronoun!  What’s important is to remember that all good gifts of each day come from a loving God who wants to be as familiar and as intimate as the best of loving Parents.  And Who is the One listening to the desires of our prayerful hearts.   💙

The Hea(r)t of a Summer Day

The Summer Day

by Mary Oliver

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

—     From New and Selected Poems, 1992

   
      This Mary Oliver poem is a favorite of mine, and I think of it often, because I am haunted not just by its beauty but by its last sentence - a most touching question for her readers to ponder.

I have used “The Summer Day” within a prayer group for contemplatives, hoping that not only will its imagery prepare our hearts to go into silence, but that its final line will cause us to ask that all-important question of our purpose.  Not an easy question and not an easy answer.  But a good one to ask and then to sit with in silence to wait for an answer, a stirring, a feeling that could point us toward fulfillment in this life... and in the next.

God has given us this one irreplaceable life, whether it is full of happiness or full of sorrow or whether it falls somewhere in between.  Regardless, to me, it is a magnificent life, because we were created by an extravagant God.  The Creator who made the grasshopper with all its simplicity and complexity, made countless gifts of wonder for us to enjoy and be thankful for. And our simple and heartfelt gratitude can be prayer enough. Oliver acknowledges that her prayer cannot always be easily defined – but she knows it when she sees it, when she does it… when she simply lives it.  And God hears and sees and is, I believe, pleased.

During these long days of summer, when the heat starts to get to us, take moments throughout the day to enjoy what this season brings specifically to you.  And like Mary Oliver, “be idle and blessed.”  Know that all the abundance of summer (yes, even its abundant heat) was made by our loving Creator for you to enjoy and to share.  And then, in moments of silence, consider with me, friend: What is God asking us to do with our own "wild and precious" lives?    💙

Midweek Meditation - Becoming Like the Heart of Jesus

       David Fleming, SJ describes Ignatian Spirituality in several ways, and one way he defines it is a “Spirituality of the Heart” (What is Ignatian Spirituality? 2008) He writes that the “heart does not mean the emotions … but refers to our inner orientation, the core of our being… Jesus observed that our heart can get untethered from our actions” when Christ said in the Gospel of Matthew – “This people honors me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.” Fleming continues to write, “When we say to someone ‘my heart goes out to you,’ we mean something more than a feeling of concern.  If said sincerely, it communicates a sense of solidarity with someone… It means something like, ‘I stand with you in this.’ It is an expression of a fundamental choice.” (p.15)

The very fact that God chose to become a human being in all ways but sin (Hebrews 4:15) shows us the Heart of God.  God loves us so much that God wanted to experience life the way we experience it.  But with one exception – the Son of God lived a human life with a Heart like no other.

Jesus came to show us how to live as our Heavenly Parent wants us to live, with compassion, mercy, love, forgiveness, and devotion to our Creator.  Jesus’s heart went out to the poor, the sick, and the marginalized.  Jesus ate and drank with those who needed him most, as the Healer of bodies and hearts.  He stood in solidarity with the “least of these” and will continue to do so until the end of time.

So now, I ask who have we been standing with this week?  Whose story or life has caused us to feel our heart going out to them?  With whom do we stand during these trying times?  Are we honoring God with more than our lips but also with our hearts – by the very way that we move throughout our day, interacting with people, interacting with the earth? 

How are we becoming like the Heart of Jesus?

 💙

Click here to read a free online copy of David Fleming’s book

What is Ignatian Spirituality?

The Heart's Thirsting for God

        I hadn't written in a number of days, and I realized that I missed the time I spent in writing.  I also realized that when I sit down to write, I am also in prayer, in a sense, and so I missed that too!

I hope you enjoyed your weekend and were able to find ways to stay cool during these blisteringly hot summer days.  On Sunday afternoon I was able to spend time with other contemplatives, other spiritual directors, and people who were interested in learning more about contemplative prayer and possibly forming community in a new and different way.  It was an amazing turnout, and it demonstrated a longing within people to spend time in prayer and to be part of community.

Longing for God is how I saw this group of 50+.  It could have just been the 96 degree temperature outside, but to me it felt like everyone was thirsting for God - seeking a closer relationship with the Divine and wanting to share time with others who feel the same.  

No matter what you did this weekend, I hope that it too brought you an awareness of God, a sense of wonder, and a feeling of hope!  💙

As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. 

My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. 

When shall I come and appear before God? 

- Psalm 42: 1-2

God’s Immeasurable Heart

   “God is a nudge.  Not in the nagging, annoying sense,

   but in a gentle, leaning-into sense.”    - Gregory Boyle, from

   Barking to the Choir: Power of Radical Kinship

       Anyone who’s a cat lover knows that feeling of their cat brushing against their leg, as they saunter by.  It can happen because there’s someone new in the room, and they are proclaiming, “This human is mine,” or it can mean “You know you haven’t fed me yet.  Just sayin’...”  But there’s another way too that certain cats can get their message across.

I used to have a beautiful, long-haired gray cat (rather, he had me).  He and I had many little games we played together; he was delightful, and I loved him dearly.  He had this way of letting me know he was there that was unique to him:  When I was working at the kitchen sink, he would walk up behind me, start to brush against my calves – then he would stop – stay there and then L-E-A-N.  It wasn’t annoying and it wasn’t nagging; his leaning against me was gentle but firm.  He knew I was there, and I knew he was there. 

So when I read Fr. Boyle’s description of God, I could relate it to the years I had with our Little Bit (or Kevin, as I used to call him).  Like him, God nudges to let us know He is here.  Like a dear cat, God can warmly and firmly lean into us, proclaiming we are His own.

As I continue growing in my spiritual life, I can often sense when God is actively working in my life.  It’s a way of discernment that comes from spending lots of hours solely in God’s Presence.  (It takes practice and devotion to know it is God and not just my ego.)  I can tell when God is nudging me gently forward.  Sometimes when I hesitate, God leans in until I sense God is with me, and then I can go forward in confidence.  But I need to be aware of God’s subtleties.  

We’ve heard that God is found in that “still small voice.”  In other words, God doesn’t approach in chaos and destruction.  God is waiting patiently for us to listen for guidance – God doesn’t mindlessly shove us into situations that will harm us.  God is found in the quiet – God rarely, if ever, uses the cacophony of life in this highly charged, overly loud, often angry, me-focused world to reach out to us.  (But then again, God can use whatever method God wants!)

So today, I invite you to be aware.  Is God nudging you toward something that brings a sense of peace?  Is God gently encouraging you to be aware of the Spirit's guidance?  Is God leaning in to let you know that the Divine is all around you? 

I hope your day is blessed, and I hope you become aware of God’s immeasurable love for you.  💙

Midweek Meditation - The Heart of a Follower

"See I am sending you out like sheep into the midst of  wolves; 

so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves."

- Matthew 10:16   

      This morning I share this quote from the Gospel of Matthew.  The same story appears in Luke's Gospel as well, but "wise" is translated as shrewd. Regardless of how these words are translated, Jesus was advising his disciples on how to go out into the world - but not to become part of the world.

To be in the world, they will need to be wise and shrewd, because they will come across townspeople who will range from mere naysayers to people who will want to kill them. But through their mission, they are to remain as innocent as doves.  They are to follow their Teacher by His example of being blameless - gentle and humble of heart.

How do you feel as a believer at this time in history?  Do you sometimes feel like you are a lamb among wolves? Do you often run into those wolves in sheep's clothing we've been warned about?  Is it possible to be in the world without being part of the world - can you maintain your innocent outlook, your hope, and your faith?  Do you buy into the world's empty promises, or are you able to wisely choose what you think will be pleasing to God?  Do you even want to please God?

The next time your faith and resolution gets weakened by the pack animals of this world, remember these reassuring words of Jesus, as Chapter 10 continues:

"And do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; rather, be afraid of the one who can destroy both soul and body...
Are not two sparrows sold for a small coin? 
Yet not one of them falls to the ground without your Father's knowledge.
Even all the hairs of your head are counted.
So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."

- Matthew 10: 28-31

💙

Living (and Dying) from the Heart

        On Saturday, I went to the memorial service for a spiritual mentor of mine who died in a rafting accident on the Yangtze River.  She was a lot younger than I and was used to more physicality than my life in recent years. Her passing was so unexpected. She will be missed by many people, and the good that she did while on earth will live on for many years.  Before, during, and after the service, I found myself pondering my mortality - again.

When Baby Boomers were young, we didn’t spend much time thinking about when we got older or about taking care of our future selves – body, mind, or spirit.  We lived in the present, for the moment, but not in the spiritual sense or the Zen sense of the word.  It basically boiled down to “Make love, not war” and “Turn on, tune in, drop out.” With whatever good intentions there may have been, these were debatable ideals with which to live one’s whole life.

I don’t expect those younger than me to die before me – and it’s even harder to find a reason, when they lived to serve humanity, with the glory of God in mind. It is one of the most difficult questions for which to find an answer.  So I did what I always do, when faced with something I want to understand better – I went looking for a book and found one by favorite author Henri Nouwen, Our Greatest Gift: A Meditation on Dying and Caring.

Nouwen was a devout priest and professor, a man who radiated the love of God, sharing it with everyone.  He spent much of his life wondering about how loveable he was to God, and yet, at the same time, expended much of his energy on making sure that everyone else knew that they were all God’s Beloved sons and daughters.  In writing this book, he wanted to “befriend death,” himself, as he watched so many of his family and friends dying.  The very premise of the book – making friends with death - was perfect for my mood. It got me thinking that if we make friends with death, it shouldn't, in theory, frighten us any longer. (Right?) And the most important lesson, I think, to learn is that by befriending death, we are also befriending God.

You see, we go through life, being watched over and loved by our Creator constantly.  God is everywhere at all times, loving us through our unloveliness and in our goodness.  But so many people don’t like knowing that God is close to us, and not out-there somewhere, because they fear God’s judgment and wrath.  But when one is the beloved, one is not afraid of the Lover.  We know that we are cared for, and the Lover wants us to know and trust that loving care. 

In his book, Nouwen tells the brief story of meeting a troupe of German circus acrobats. He loved their high-flying tricks, so he went backstage to tell them, and eventually he became friends with them.  He talked with one of the flyers and asked how it all worked.  His new friend told him that to be successful at his craft, he had to have “’complete trust in my catcher… the real star is … my catcher…. The secret is that the flyer does nothing and the catcher does everything.  When I fly to [the catcher], I have simply to stretch out my arms and hands and wait for him to catch me …’” It turns out that if the flyer grabbed on to the catcher, he would break the catcher’s wrists, so the flyer must trust that he will be caught safely.

Nouwen wrote that when he heard this, “the words of Jesus flashed through my mind: ’Father, into your hands, I commend my Spirit.’  Dying is trusting in the catcher.  To care for the dying is to say, ‘Don’t be afraid. Remember that you are the beloved child of God.  He will be there when you make your long jump.  Don’t try to grab him; he will grab you. Just stretch out your arms and hands and trust, trust, trust.”  (pp 66-67)

I sat with that story for a while and kept returning to the image during the rest of the weekend.  Death is a surrendering – the ultimate trusting submission to God.  As we grow in our love for God, ourselves, and our neighbor, we learn to trust God even more.  And isn’t that part of the worry that some people have about death?  They don’t trust that there’s going to be Someone or anyone out there. But as believers, knowing Whose beloved we are, we can grow in our trust until comes the day when we simply “stretch out” our arms and fall into the loving Hands of the One who will catch us.  

Thanks be to God!   💙

Blessings that Make Us Believe – When We Open our Hearts

       I don’t know why this phrase – blessings that make us believe – came to me, when I sat down to write this morning.  Maybe I saw it online or while reading a book.  Regardless, now I want to spend time pondering what it could mean for maybe you and me today.

When I think about my blessings, I have so many that their number is too high to spend time counting.  I wouldn’t get anything else done!  But what about those things (places, people, events) that happen to all of us that at first glance don’t appear to be blessings at all?

Throughout my years of study and having a spiritual director, I’ve had times to figuratively imagine (and literally draw) a timeline of my life.  But it wouldn’t really be a straight line, because looking back at my life, it has never gone just directly forward.  What about you?  If you drew the timeline of your life – no matter how long or how short – would it be simply a straight line?

My timeline, when I drew it, had dips and drop offs, curves and canyons, high and low points.  And some of what I’ve considered the lowest points have been the times when I felt most alone – alienated from good people and also from God.  The times when my life would curve around (and around!), was I making progress - by going deeper – or was I just spinning my wheels?  What about you?  What made your lowest times?  What caused them?  How do you see them now?

I think if I’d drawn a timeline during my early adult life, I probably would have looked outside myself to explain the worst times, blaming others for my life being in the pits.  And during those same years, I probably would have seen most of my good times as being of my own making.  

Ah, but then one gets older and hopefully wiser…  And not the wisdom from life experience or reading good books, but a more important, timeless wisdom: Awareness that we are more than just physical beings; we are body, mind, and spirit. All three are equally important – and I will daresay that our spiritual side is the most important of the three (I know you had to see that coming). 

If we go about each day, living in the wisdom gained from body, mind, and spirit, we become aware of everything in life being a blessing in one way or another.  We learn from each bad time; we grow when we have to reach out for help; we begin to wonder if we were created for something other than just living a convenient, comfortable, and easy life.  Then we start to look for our purpose – and once that happens, watch out! Our hearts open to the life we were meant to live – the life that God is beckoning us to have with the Spirit.  And once our hearts are open to Possibility, our lives are never the same.

There is nothing we experience without God's presence. Wisdom helps us realize that God is with us always and no matter what – when we spin our wheels, take two steps back, or fall into a deep hole.  It’s part of seeing “God in all things.”  And everything – eventually – can then become blessing.   💙

Midweek Meditation – Heart to Heart

       Hello Friends… For about three years I volunteered in the pastoral care department of a Federal Prison in Florida.  I saw and listened to how time can begin to wear on inmates.  Seeing this, I wanted to help ease their sorrows and boredom by giving them a little something to do.  So I created a two-page “Midweek Meditation,” handed out each Wednesday.  On one side was usually a scripture passage which I would then incorporate into a reflection for the week, and on the other side I’d create a word search puzzle or something to occupy their minds for a few minutes.

I think I was the one who gained more from this exercise, as it gave me a chance to write about my favorite subject – God!  And too, because of my audience, I was always reminded of my many blessings.  So I thought I would do something similar for Wednesdays in this Blog.  I’ll offer a scripture reading or a prayer or a quote from a book for you to ponder throughout your day.

The first thing I thought of to start with is my favorite prayer by Thomas Merton. (http://www.merton.org/). And because I was too comfortable at my desk to get up and find one of my books that contain this prayer, I Googled it instead.  To my delight, a YouTube video version of the prayer came up – it is Merton’s prayer read by a young Franciscan friar that I had the pleasure of meeting last year, Fr. Dan Horan, OFM.  So I include his reading of the prayer, accompanied by photographs of the beloved Thomas Merton (Trappist Monk and priest) here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqtvB0_MqEM

                                                               ☩ 

May our day ahead be filled with the certainty that God is with us each moment, and there is nothing God desires more than our companionship.  Today let’s step out in faith – even if we don’t yet believe this truth fully – and trust that we please God just by our choosing to search for Him.  Amen.  💙

Waiting and Wondering – A Lesson for the Heart

“’For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Eternal, ‘plans for peace,

not evil, to give you a future and hope – never forget that. At that time,

you will call out for Me, and I will hear. You will pray, and I will listen.

You will look for Me intently, and you will find Me. Yes, I will be found

by you,’ says the Eternal…”    - Jeremiah 29: 11-13  (The Voice)

A prayer partner, another spiritual director and retreat leader, sent me a hand-written note that I received yesterday.  It included this scripture passage within it.  And although I have seen it and been led to read this Old Testament passage so many times, it seems that each time I read it, it has a new meaning for what is going on in my life at the time.

For me right now, I am waiting and wondering about an important upcoming decision.  The decision is not mine to make but someone else’s, and it will impact me profoundly, either way.  And yet I have placed what happens into the Hands of my Creator, who I have learned does listen.  My Heavenly Parent – the One I am learning to trust more deeply – always has the best in mind for me. 

How about you?  Have you been in a similar situation?  How did you handle it?  Did you think that you had to do it all yourself?  Did you believe that nothing would get done unless you were in charge?  Did you lose hope in waiting, or did you find that prayer or reading scripture helped you?

This quote, and note from a friend, came at just the right time.  Through it, I am reminded of the numerous times that God has taken care of me over the years…  No, my answers did not come right away.  Sometimes the answer did arrive sooner than later, and it was “no.”  The bad times did not lift immediately.  Nothing in life is easy.  Pretty. Much. Nothing. But I hold on to this promise that God made before the Babylonian-exiled Israelites.  I too am not alone.  The One who matters most in my life says, “You pray. I’ll listen.” And, right now, that’s the finest thing my heart can hope for.  💙

   [Thanks, Lorie!]

Love God wth all Your Heart... and Love your Neighbor

       I spent part of my weekend reading a 2019 memoir by Dr. Ayaz Virji entitled Love Thy Neighbor: A Muslim Doctor's Struggle for Home in Rural America. The title is based on what is the basic premise of faith in Judeo-Christian beliefs. But Jewish and Christian people do not hold a monopoly on this belief.  Loving God and loving our neighbor is a tenet of life among all of God's faithful children. 

Dr. Virji is so shocked the day after the 2016 US presidential elections that he threatens to leave the small town in Minnesota where he has moved, with his family, to bring an improved healthcare system to this rural part of the country.  As a devout Muslim, of Indian descent, he became angry and bitter when he found that some of the very people he treated (and saved) were the ones who voted in a way that felt to him like a slap in the face. 

But thankfully, with some divine intervention, he and the Lutheran associate pastor in his town put together a series of lectures for Minnesota (and beyond) to educate people about what Islam means to 99.99% of those who are of the Muslim faith.  His talks come from his heart, and he only wants people to understand that radicals and terrorists do not speak for his religion, any more than the Rev. Jim Jones, of the Peoples Temple fame, spoke for all Christians. 

About midway through his book, Dr. Virji talks about what prayer – praying five times a day – means to him and to his faith: “I say essentially the same prayers every day, texts from the Quran… In Islam, we believe that the prayer begins when it ends – with the deeds you perform after the prayer is done…. We ask of ourselves, ‘What are you doing? How are you treating people? Are you doing the right thing? What are you doing when nobody is watching?’” [p. 117] 

This paragraph was the most poignant for me, in his whole book, as it reminded me of the Letter of James in the Bible: “See how a person is justified by works and not by faith alone.... For just as a body without a spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.” 

And before James wrote his epistle, Jesus had told the story of the Farmer (a metaphor for God) sowing seeds that fell in different places along the ground – some fell by the road where birds ate them, some fell on rocky ground where the seeds grew quickly with shallow roots so were then burnt by the sun, some grew among weeds and the sprouts were choked out by them. But the seeds that fell on fertile ground began to grow and yield fruit in the form of grain for all to eat and enjoy. (Matthew 13: 1-9) I know that God has planted seeds in me (and in all of us, really), but did they fall among weeds, that distract and dissuade, or on the good soil of a faithful heart? 

As I sit here at my computer, I started my day in prayer and plan to continue it throughout today.  But how will my prayer truly begin at the end of my words or at the end of my silence?  As Dr. Virji says, I too “am exercising discipline,” [ibid] by spending time in prayer – but then what? 

I have to ask myself, “Is a prayerful heart ever just enough?”  💙